Why do I identify myself as “pretty messy”? So when I started my blog I thought it would be a fun idea to talk about what I feel and discuss in real life, but with a greater audience. I then found myself not being as authentic as I thought I was being because I was seeing what other bloggers were putting out there. I saw their perfectly clean homes, the perfectly made meals, and their perfectly decorated spaces. I looked around in my life and thought. “What the hell, why doesn’t my home look like that?” And that is when I realized I am pretty messy.
But what is “pretty messy”? I like to think of it as that I may not have everything together, but I’ll always try and look my best with a smile and an attitude to match. So it doesn’t really matter to me that I’m writing this post right now with only one pair of jeans folded out of the stack of clean laundry on my couch behind me, and that instead of sitting on said couch I’m sitting on the floor because I think it’s more comfortable. This is me. I am pretty messy, and I’m okay with it.
Just to clarify, I’m not saying this to sound cool, or like, “Yea, those bloggers don’t seem real because I’m the realest out there”. Listen, I’m just like everyone else with some dirty dishes and a pair of shoes here and there, but I’m trying to get myself a little better at a time, and I believe that the purpose of my blog now is to pretty much embarrass the crap out of myself to show that not everyone who portrays themselves as having the perfect life is actually living that. I look back at some of my posts that are authentic and I think how much better I felt after writing them. Then I look at others and think about how hard I was trying to be someone else. So, this is my personal wake up call. I’m going to be myself. My crazy, wonderful, pretty messy self.